HandsomeGuy: Hi, how are you?
BeautifulGirl: great, what's your asl?
HandsomeGuy: 24 m Hawai'i, you?
BeautifulGirl: 21 f Hawai'i
And so it begins.
Meeting people online has become easier than ever and, because of this, people are "hooking up" across the country. The repercussions of dating online can be dangerous, but it seems Internet daters value love over safety. In fact, many people have gotten married after meeting each other on the Net.
Relationships develop easily online, especially through chat rooms. It is easy to converse candidly and openly with someone you are not looking at in the eye. You can tell your darkest secrets and still be free of embarrassment and consequences. Because of this, Internet friendships are very easy to build. Soon, you could find yourself developing an Internet crush, which may feel like love.
Psychologists have said the relationships that start through meetings online can be stronger than relationships starting in person. Meetings online contribute nothing physical to the relationship's attraction. The relationship is built starting with conversation and communication, which is important to a long-lasting and successful relationship.
So, why not give Internet dating a try, right? No matter how many times you have heard it before, I will say it again ... the Internet is a dangerous place to meet people. Unless you understand the dangers and the deceit people use online, you will be taken advantage of.
LIES, LIES and MORE LIES
The Internet is the easiest place to lie, and people will lie about anything. They can lie about what they do, how old they are, where they live, what they look like, how much they weigh, etc. A person could easily send you someone else's picture and pass it off as their own. This is done very frequently. You should be very wary if you receive a picture from someone that looks like it was taken off of the Abercrombie and Fitch Web site, because it probably was!
It is fine to be skeptical and you should be. When chatting, ask lots of questions and ask for more current pictures. If something the person says seems too good to be true, then it probably is. Listen to your gut instincts.
Since the advent of Web cams and voice chat it has, in a sense, become easier to detect if someone is lying. However, not everyone uses these added features, and you should view Web cams with caution.
INTERNET AFFAIRS
Relationships are very easy to make online, which also makes it just as easy to break the ones you already have. Some married individuals go online and look for attention that they do not seem to be getting in their current relationships.
Bridgewater, New Jersey (AP): "Goydan filed divorce papers Jan. 23 that included dozens of e-mail exchanges — some sexually explicit — between his wife and a married man she met on America Online. The man, whose online name was The Weasel, was identified in court papers only as Ray from North Carolina.
Diane Goydan's relationship with the man apparently never was consummated, but her husband, John Goydan of Bridgewater, claimed the pair had planned a real tryst this weekend at a New Hampshire bed-and-breakfast."
Experiences like the Goydans' have multiplied over the past few years. If you notice your significant other spending a good amount of time chatting on the Net, be forewarned.
SEX AND CHATTING
Ok, let's just be blunt here. If it's not already obvious, people go online looking for sex. This is apparent in numerous chat rooms and is exactly why minors should not be allowed anywhere within a five-meter radius of an online chat room.
If you are a parent and you allow your children to chat online, stop them. Remember, there are people who go online strictly looking for sex!
Sex surrounds the whole chat environment whether it is nude photos in a user profile or porn sites being spammed (advertised) in chat rooms. People send online messages asking others to meet for sex, to have cybersex (like phone sex, except with typing instead of talking), or to view them nude via their Web cam. It never ends.
The problem is that there is no social etiquette online; therefore, people feel free to do and ask whatever they want.
THE REAL-LIFE MEETING
If you find that you believe the person whom you have been conversing online with is "perfect" for you and you want to meet them, make sure you follow a few basic steps:
- Make sure you have talked to the other person for a minimum of two to three months and still feel the same about him/her. If someone wants to meet after only talking to you for less than a couple weeks, a red flag should pop up in your head that something's wrong. Either this person meets people online frequently, or he doesn't want to waste any more time talking to you for another few weeks when he could find sex elsewhere.
- Plan to meet in a public place. Public, as in where there are lots of people, not at a parking garage or at a park at night.
- Tell someone what you're planning to do. There is no way around this rule, so start figuring out who you are going to tell.
- Have a friend check up on you and have a way out of the meeting.
There are many different types of people who go online and, as long as you can distinguish the compulsive liars, sex addicts and married men and women, you should be able to find a group of individuals who are honest and want the same things as you. If you find yourself getting caught up in this new movement of online dating, just remember to listen to your gut instincts, because they are always right.
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Name: Gary
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